i really wish james franco would like my vagina
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
