Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
