don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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