i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
