So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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