Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
she looked like the before picture.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
