He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize