Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
She announced her abortion via fbk
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
