Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
