sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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