Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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