I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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