guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
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