marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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