what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
