So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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