Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i wish my penis had a tongue
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
