I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
he thought i was a dude.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
