I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Success! We fucked roommates!
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