that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
