so that wasnt chicken after all
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Randomize
