hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
