Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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