Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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