You work out of a Hotel?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
