Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
