My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
