Don't you send me to vm
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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