In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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