shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
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