Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I forget how to act sober
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
