we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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