So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
