God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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