"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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