The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
