Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
