We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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