i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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