4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
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