i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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