hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
