i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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