i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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