I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
it was like eating out sand paper
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
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