Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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