Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
