i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You work out of a Hotel?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
