butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
