In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I did not marry a roomba.
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